I was in Starbucks RCBC earlier this morning. While waiting for a friend, I saw this nice article in Philippine Star entitled “The right to be single and fabulous” by Gabbie Tatad. I am inspired to write something related to this topic as I can very well relate to the topic discuss. So here’s my take on being Single and Fabulous.
I am 32 and turning 33 in less than a month. I have had two serious relationships – one is 8.5 years, the other is 2.5 years. Majority of my elementary, high school, and college classmates are either married, married with kids, have kids, or in a relationship. I am not dating and no one has asked me out on a date since I broke up with my last ex-boy friend. 🙂 Relatives, some close friends or acquaintances often asks me these questions: when will you get married? why don’t you have a boyfriend? why did you broke up with your ex? and other similar questions. Only a few understands my situation, and there are times, that I am affected by these questions or with what I see around me. It is quite hard to respond to these questions especially when what you see almost everywhere is otherwise.
Single, Happy, and Fabulous
Chopsticks may come in pairs, as shoes do. We often hear others say that they are incomplete when they are not with their partners or when they are alone. I disagree with this notion. It is you who have the sole power to make yourself complete even without a partner. You are not a chopstick, nor a shoe, nor a thing that come in pairs. YOU ARE A PERSON and you are already complete as you are. Do not make your happiness dependent on another person. Happiness and contentment is a choice. Yes it is true that this is easier said than done. But if we have an open mind and heart to accept things as they are, to value each and every blessing that we receive we will always feel that we are complete.
Being alone allows you to fully appreciate yourself. I haven’t discovered the intricacies of my own self until after I broke up with my last boyfriend. I never realized that I can further push myself beyond my initially set limits, that I can do more than what I thought I can do. Being alone allows you to leverage on your strengths to overcome your weaknesses. Being alone enables you to sculpt yourself rather than others define you. It allows you to focus on what you have rather than looking at what you lack. Love exists in so many different forms and source of love is not only from your romantic partner.
Being solitary is being alone well: being alone luxuriously immersed in doings of your own choice, aware of the fullness of your won presence rather than of the absence of others. Because solitude is an achievement. (Alice Koller)
Being single never meant that you know nothing about love and relationship. It may mean that one prefers being solo than being in a false relationship. I have read in an online article that “If you are not happy being single. You will never be happy in a relationship. Get your own life and love it first. Then share it. Love when you’re ready. Not when you’re lonely.” Lastly, quoted directly from Hugh Downs “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” Cheer up lady! Be single and fabulous!